There is a colour tree in Berkeley Square
Yellow, orange, red, green – lots of branches
Shape of a lollipop
But all curly, wurly
Standing there, leading us on
Challenging us to say if it is real or not
But who wants to define it, who wants to put it down –
Let’s all swim to Cassiopoeia!
August 30, 2014
10 August 2014 Memory
Have just sent in a long letter to the British Psychological Society complaining about an article on memory in the June 2014 issue of the Psychologist magazine. It falls into the classic crime of reducing all memory to conscious recall, as if this were all that there is.
The controversies about memory in therapy might be eased if we accepted that there were four memories, not one.
1. Intellectual memory, cognitive memory, is located somehow in the brain, mostly in the cerebral cortex. The details are not yet all worked out, but nearly all of the work in memory in psychology has to do with this type of memory. And there tends to be a dogmatism that this is all there is.
2. Emotional memory also has a great deal to do with the brain, but here it is mainly in the limbic system, and takes the form of images rather than words. It is difficult to reach other than by actually re-experiencing the events concerned. This also applies to memories held in the muscles, as Reich and other body therapists have discovered. See Babette Rothschild (2000).
3. Bodily memory is held all over the body. Again it has to be re-experienced or relived, rather than called up verbally. Graham Farrant (1990) calls it cellular memory, and has written a good deal about it. Much of the primal work in psychotherapy (Brown & Mowbray 1994) depends upon this level of memory. David Chamberlain (1998) has given much of the evidence for birth memories being of this kind.
4. Subtle memory or soul memory is not located in the body or brain, but in the subtle body. It holds memories of previous lives and of lives lived at other levels of the transpersonal realm. It is not difficult to tap into once one makes the effort, as Roger Woolger (1990) has argued.
Each of these four has its own rules and its own mode of investigation. But 2, 3 and 4 are hardly studied in academic psychology. This is a great shame to psychology, which needs to open up more.
August 10, 2014
20 July 2014
One of the normal outcomes of therapy, and of meditation too, is a different way of having emotions. Basically it is a movement from being dominated by our emotions to being behind our emotions. As we say – “We have emotions – the emotions do not have us.” This does not sound so bad. So far, so good. But my recent experience shows another side to this achievement. My wife Sue and I went in for a scheme offered by the Guide Dogs for the Blind people. You get a puppy just a few weeks old, and take charge of it (with a lot of support and help from the Guide Dogs people) for a year. At the end of the year it goes for further training, or for stud. You get all the food paid for, and any vet’s bills covered, meetings where you can learn more about your dog and so forth – wonderful system. Of course everyone says – “Won’t it be awful when you have to let him go?” And my answer was – “No, because I am not going to allow myself to fall in love with him.” Our puppy was a gorgeous Golden Retriever, who grew up to be a real star – always the centre of attention, always basking in the adoration of his public. But when it came to be the time to let him go on (in his case it was for stud) I did not feel anything special. It was just a fact.
However, on that evening, when he was to go the next day, my wife (who always did most of the work in raising him, and had many connections with other puppy walkers and others in the Guide Dog community) was very sad. I was completely on the wrong wavelength for her, and there was quite a rift between us. This was quite unintended, and I didn’t like it. It was painful for me, and quite out of the range of my expectations. This was quite unexpected – I had just not thought it through enough. I was hurt, and shocked, and brought up short by reality. (Due to her maturity, our rift did not last for very long, which was lucky for me.)
So now I have resolved that, if we have a dog again, I shall not have any firm resolutions or decisions about it, but simply allow myself to feel whatever I would normally feel, without any particular effort at control. This then hopefully will allow me to be more in tune with my wife, and more real and normal. That is odd in a way – sort of resolving to be human, which sounds ridiculous.
You see, once you have attained maturity with your emotions, there is no going back. Whatever happens with your emotions, they are your emotions. As we say, we have our emotions – our emotions do not have us. You cannot unlearn that lesson, but you can make better and wiser decisions about the matter. You can decide to roll with reality, rather than controlling it. Just because I have the power to control my feelings, that does not mean that I have to do that. I can just let go and stay in tune with my wife Sue, like a normal husband. Sounds quite easy, really.
July 23, 2014
8 July 2014
All that work I did last year, on chapters for books by others, is now paying off, and the chapters are appearing, one by one. Here is the latest list:
‘The transpersonal in individual therapy’ 497-518 in W Dryden & A Reeves (eds) The handbook of individual therapy (6th ed) London: Sage 2014
‘The transpersonal approach to coaching’ 145-156 in E Cox, T Bachkirova & D Clutterbuck (eds) The complete handbook of coaching (2nd ed) London: Sage 2014
‘Existential analysis and humanistic psychotherapy’ 549-561 in K J Schneider, J F Pierson & J F T Bugental (eds) The handbook of humanistic psychology: Theory, research and practice (2nd ed) London: Sage 2015
‘Existential, humanistic and transpersonal therapies and the relational approach’ 40-50 in D Charura & S Paul (eds) The therapeutic relationship handbook: Theory and practice Maidenhead: The Open University Press 2014
There is also another one to come, on Primal Integration, but I have not got the full details of publication yet. It is nice to see all these in print at last, and available to all.
July 8, 2014
I went to the Royal Academy Summer Exhibition last week. It did not impress me very much. But it reminded me of the last time I was there.
When I visited the David Hockney exhibition in the Royal Academy, I was not expecting much. It was just something one should do, to keep up with the times. But when I saw ‘The Hawthorn Bush’ something extraordinary happened. I was taken into a realm of peace and joy. There was the unmistakable ring of the numinous. It was enormous, it filled a wall by itself, it was a presence in the room. It took up the whole space. It spoke to me.
My heart really did leap up. This was the real thing. Just as when I walked into the Rothko room in the Tate Modern, there was that crash of recognition – that outburst of ‘This is it!’ What such works have in common is that you cannot represent them. No reproduction, no other rendering, can give you the same experience. Just as with Epstein’s statue of ‘Jacob and the Angel’, you have to be there with it, somehow joined with it, admitted to its essence.
‘The Hawthorn Bush’ is different. It is there. It looks at you, and demands that you look at it. But it is not just the looking, it is the being. It is there, with you, in the room. And the other paintings, and the other spectators, fade out, go silent. Just me. And it. Mutually present. This is it.
June 10, 2014
20 May 2014
Just been seeing ‘Poet in New York’ on TV. Marvellous reading of ‘Do not go gentle into that good night’ (Dylan Thomas) by Tom Hollander. It reminded me of 1959, when I had to take five exams in order to get on to my degree course at Birkbeck. I took the philosophy exam and the final exam for the Sociology diploma I had been doing, an A level exam in logic and another one in literature, and a scholarship exam to Birkbeck College. The A level exam in English Literature featured one of those ‘compare and contrast’ questions on two great poems about death – ‘Do not go gentle into that good night’ and John Donne’s ‘Death be not proud’ – two of my favourite poems, so I was lucky with that. The Hollander reading was so brilliant, it brought tears to my eyes. He had obviously been listening to Thomas’ own reading of the poem, and reproduced it faithfully. Dylan Thomas was one of the great readers of his own poems, and I particularly love the way he does ‘After the Funeral’ – one of the great performances, I think. Really moving and shattering. I wish we could hear John Donne reading his own poetry!
May 20, 2014
12 May 2014
WHAT HAPPENED IN THE GROUP?
Then one cold Saturday in February we had an all-day [primal] marathon and I had the most profound experience of my life. On that dav I fell in love for the first time. It was the first time because my head, heart and body were involved. I was no longer stone cold rigid and unavailable. I experienced my own beauty that day, as a woman, as a person. I really felt it on the inside. I loved everyone as they were. With each person and with each moment I was different. I saw their perfection and I also saw their limits. I was not judging. I was just appreciating. I went through a door to a place I could only call whole, clear vision. A sight that sees all undisturbedly. The endless self judgements had quieted. I was. I felt very young, open, vulnerable, not afraid and at peace.
This extract from a participant speaks to me – we sometimes forget what therapy is all about. I want to keep alive that hope, that insight always.
May 12, 2014
2 April 2014 THE BEAUTY OF THERAPY
A young man writes to his therapist months after finishing therapy, and relates the episode which moved him most. He was walking along the beach near his home, and saying to himself – “I am such a failure: I have disappointed my parents, I have disappointed my teachers, I have disappointed my boss, there is just no hope for me.” But then, all at once, as he walked along, he saw the sun setting across the water, and suddenly went into a quite different mood. He said to himself – “My parents had the wrong expectations for me, my teachers had the wrong expectations for me, my boss has the wrong expectations for me – I am not the picture they painted. I am me!” – and his heart leaped up, and he opened his eyes, and he kept repeating “I am me!”, louder and louder. And when he got home, he covered a big sheet of paper with the words – “I am me!” “I am me!” “I am me”, over and over again. And it was as if he opened his heart, and saw the world through his own eyes, for the first time. He wrote that he had not thought too much about his therapy before that time, but all at once he got it.
My Masterclass on 29 March went so well – some people from abroad made the journey too. Really digging deep into the Transpersonal, even covering feminism, religion, intuition and transcendental empathy. Really pleased with that.
April 1, 2014
23 January 2014 SOMETHING WRONG WITH THERAPY?
One of the things that happens in therapy is that there may be some kind of setback, where things are not going smoothly or pleasantly or excitingly. I once made a study of alchemy, and found that the old alchemists knew of this, and mentioned it specifically as one of the essential moments in the alchemical process – they called it the nigredo, the blackening of the work. At such moments there may be what looks like a mistake, or a disagreement, or a failure, on the part of the therapist. This needs to be understood and properly handled if we want to make the most of the moment. It is by no means the end of the road. It may strengthen the relationship, if it is well handled.
February 4, 2014
Applications are now coming in for the workshop on 29 March. This is a full Masterclass, and incorporates a lot of new material. In particular, people may have done my exercise on Intuition, which is quite revealing, but the new workshop incorporates actual tuition and practice on intuition, to make this more available in everyday practice. Also there will be actual practical work on transcendental empathy, to make that more available in the work. I have been greatly encouraged by reading the new Handbook of Transpersonal Psychology, which has reminded me of the whole range of stuff that has come out in the past 30 years or so, including the feminist approach, the body-oriented material, the new research on hallucinogens (now that this has become possible again), and in general the research advances, many of which I had not heard of. These are exciting times. Remember that my email address is email@example.com
January 10, 2014